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1. |
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The days run together
Last week
Last year
Is there any difference
A waking dream
A lucid night terror
Who is screaming
Was I screaming
Is someone there
Is anyone there
Day or night
Tomorrow or yesterday
Nocturnal
Immersed in excesses
Others keep hidden
Under cover of night
Marathon death march
No respite
No destination
The moon went behind a cloud
Then I lost a week
The birds were screaming
The birds are shrieking
If someone told me of the end of days:
Am I still alive
Or have I died
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2. |
Big Man
07:56
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I hate
I hate
Yes i fucking hate
I fucking hate you
I hate you
All of you
The unwashed masses
You entitled fucking cunts
You rude fucking cows
Yes I hate
Yes I hate
Your fat wagging tongues
And soggy rolling eyes
I hate
Don't fucking touch me
Your inability to listen
Don't FUCKING touch me
Like a child
Like an animal
Is that what you want?
Is this what you want?
A hand around your fucking throat
A fist in the fucking gut
Is that what you need
Nose—bloodied
Eyes—gouged
Lip—split
This is what you need from daddy
To be told
To be led
Mewling
To the pyre
To the guillotine
Bite the curb
Fucking parasite
Try to take from me
Try me
Run your fucking mouth
Shitstain
Cunt
Fucking animal
Here comes big brother
Ask me again
Run your mouth again
Flap your fucking tongue again
And you wonder
You fucking wonder why
I hate
I hate
Yes I fucking hate
I fucking hate you
I hate you
All of you
Every
Single
Last
One
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3. |
Dysregulated
09:46
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4. |
Negative Space
03:02
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Shaking
Irregular eating habits
scheduled bouts of depression
anxiety attacks on the clock
feigned pleasantries
sweating sickness
ill-defined
undiagnosed
blurred vision
frantic speech patterns
random mispronunciations
muscle spasms
indigestion
acid reflux
vaguely localized ache
sudden stabbing pain
headache and nausea
substance abuse
depression
lethargic
exhausted
insomniatic
boredom
a lack of inspiration
listless
easily aggravated
irritable
prone to outbursts of anger
easily annoyed
diminished libido
a rich inner fantasy life
delayed gratification
lowered standards
easily disappointed
a perceptible lack of optimism
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5. |
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Silent streets
At night
Strung out on isolation
Left to my own devices
Every night
Like cracked pavement
That's felled me before
Same empty storefronts
Expectation of chainlink
The certainty of the waiting empty room
The bouncer sees me
I see him
This ritual
An arm's length acquaintance
Repetitive acknowledgment
From nods to words
He told me I was beautiful
At least someone told me
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STRAIGHT PANIC Providence, Rhode Island
Queer Power Electronics
Minneapolis (2014-2017)
New Orleans (2017-2020)
Providence (2020-)
Additional related works also documented here.
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